Woke up today feeling a little tired. Of course, since we were up a good part of the evening celebrating, that is no surprise! Our annual July Fourth event was a huge success. It was perfect having a so many friends there to wish us well and see them share in our happiness. July 4th is already a special time for our family. Tadd's birthday is around this time, we started dating around this time many years ago, we moved into our new house around this time (thus starting the tradition of having people over) and now we can add the day we became parents. It is nice to be able to have so many significant moments around the same time. It makes it easier to remember things!

Here are some more details about how we found out. I had an acupuncture appointment for the early morning. I told Tadd to call me on my cell if he got the call while I was at the appointment just in case. I honestly thought I would be in the car on the way home by then. Nope! While I was laying on the table with the pins stuck all over me, I heard the buzz-buzz of my phone. Acupuncture usually relaxes me, but there is something about waiting for the call that will change your life that makes a person a little anxious.

As soon as I was de-pinned and could get out the office (by the way, my acupuncturist has been cleaning out her children's old toys to pass along to us. Is she not the nicest lady?! If you are in Charlotte or Davidson and are interested in acupuncture, then please PLEASE check them out! http://www.acupuncture-charlotte.com/) I called Tadd. I asked if we got a call, he said Yes...I then cautiously asked if it was good news and he burst out YES! I then proceeded to scream in my car (which I do not recommend since I ended up in the wrong lane and held up traffic a bit) He told me our travel date and our embassy date and everything he could think of. We talked about how AMAZING it is that all eight of our agency families passed court and how much we would need to do at this point. He also let me know that our agency rep was working and she said I could call with any questions. Which I did as soon as I hung up with the phone, just so I could scream with her as well! She laughed and said she knew I couldn't have been home when she called because it was just WAY too quiet on the other end and she KNEW I would be going wild. I then called my mother to tell her the news. She screamed incoherently for about 5 minutes straight. I seriously just kept talking over her because I had no idea what she was saying, but I swear she was excited.

So we are now officially parents. We took full advantage of celebrating last night. After all, it will probably be our last big shin-dig sans children. It is all pretty surreal at this point. We are doing some serious baby shopping and are gladly accepting hand me downs. I am looking at calendars to start planning my leave and calling day cares. But I am also trying to wrap my head around all of this. The journey to become parents is finally coming to an end.  After three and a half years and many false starts and seemingly dead ends, we are getting closer to crossing the threshold. I have absolutely no idea what to expect. I feel like I should be more nervous about how to change diapers and how to accomplish feeding two infants. Strangely, my biggest worry is who I will become as a mother. I mean, I am finally at a place where I like myself and here I am about to change to someone different. Is it ok that I still have dreams and want to see them accomplished? Is it horrible that I want to do a play next summer or that I want to finish my last year of school or that I want to keep writing? Or will all those ideas just go away as soon as I see my babies? Will I even care? Over the years, I have spoken to so many different kinds of moms, looking for role models as I piece together what type of mom I would like to be. Some like the choices they made, some do not. It seems more to do with the woman than with the actual choices since what works for one mother will make another mother resentful. Right now I am just trying to be honest about the things that I feel are essential to how I define myself and try to preserve them. After all, my babies deserve to have a complete mommy, not one constantly wishing for something else.

So to all my friends and loved ones, both new and old, face to face or in the blogosphere, please plan let me keep up with you even after we become parents. It seems pretty easy for to just disappear but living in a vacuum will make our life more difficult. Of course, I realize I have to do my part too, so keep an eye out for more regular updates. (Too be fair, the past few weeks have been a nightmare between work projects, rehearsals, and just life. Since things are slowing down I can get back to more balance.)